Everyone Deserves Success
Bitterness Series
“Why is it that we get so bitter at the fact that someone else succeeds where we fail?”
“6 When the men were returning home after David had killed the Philistine, the women came out from all the towns of Israel to meet King Saul with singing and dancing, with joyful songs and with timbrels and lyres. 7 As they danced, they sang:
“Saul has slain his thousands,
and David his tens of thousands.”
8 Saul was very angry; this refrain displeased him greatly. “They have credited David with tens of thousands,” he thought, “but me with only thousands. What more can he get but the kingdom?” 9 And from that time on Saul kept a close eye on David.”
Explanation:
The news that David has slain the giant Philistine Goliath has spread like wildfire throughout the land. When David returns home, he is showered with praise and adoration from the people of Israel, as was typical for war heroes during this time period.¹ This reaction by his subjects raised King Saul's eyebrows. He became resentful and bitter at the fact that David was encroaching in his popularity as King. The fact that God had withdrawn his support from Saul only added fuel to the fire. It is here that we find that Saul's pride in his loyal subject David is being morphed into envy and jealousy, a bitterness that would drive Saul to murderous heights and contribute to his own downfall.
Connection:
If there is something people hate more than failure, it is seeing someone else succeed where we have failed. If the person is less qualified than we, it tends only to add insult to injury. Why is it that we get so bitter at the fact that someone else succeeds where we fail? Should we not be happy in that someone was able to get the job done? The truth is that it is a reflection of our hearts. We love to receive praise, as it bolsters our own ego and fills our hearts with a lust for affirmation. Our identity and security become wrapped up and defined by our abilities. When we become bitter and jealous, it alters our perception. We may become conniving or treacherous, or perhaps depressed and withdrawn. Thus, it must always be affirmed that one has their Identity in Jesus. Because we have been purchased by the blood of Christ, we no longer need to seek our worth or affirmation by our accomplishments. Because he has accomplished all, we are able to rest in what he has done.
Action:
Rest In Your Identity - Much of our bitterness stems from an insecurity in whom God says we are. The "Old Adam" clings to our nature, and our faith in God's word and actions become weak. Therefore, we must always return to God's word which defines who we are. Through his word he tells us that we do not need to define ourselves, but that he defines us. As Paul tells us, our lives are "hidden in Christ" (Col 3:3).
Become a Co-Worker - Instead of recognizing God's hand in the work of David, Saul set himself up in opposition to what David was doing. Rather, Saul could have become an aide to David, assisting David in what God was doing through him. It is important to remember that just because someone else succeeds where you fail does not mean you can't contribute to what is being done. Offer to become a co-laborer with them, that the two of you might work together to accomplish the task.
Pray For The Ones Making You Bitter - Our Lord Jesus offers a counter-intuitive solution to those who are creating problems for us. He tells us to pray for and bless our enemies (Matt 5:44-45). When we do so, our hearts become focused on our neighbor as opposed to curved in on ourselves. It helps to change the way we view situations.
¹ Mary J. Evans, 1 and 2 Samuel, Understanding the Bible Commentary Series (Grand Rapids: Baker 1 Publishing Group, 2012), 167.