Restore Your Faith In Others
Restore Your Faith in Others
“ it goes without saying that while trust is important for any healthy relationship, not everyone is worthy of being trusted - especially if they have given a reason not to be trusted…”
“Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.”
Explanation:
Christians are undoubtedly held to a higher standard than the rest of the world. Blinded by mistrust and vengeance, the way of the world is to return evil for evil – an unending cycle of destruction. Paul teaches us a new way to live – a way in light of the Gospel which is built on the foundation of forgiveness – a forgiveness which begins with God and spills over to our relationships with one another. Often, it is in the midst of sin that trust in our relationships becomes shattered. The beauty of Paul’s teaching here is that this need not be permanently the case. Restoration and forgiveness are possible, and where there is forgiveness, there is healing. Jacob and Esau spent decades estranged and mistrusting, yet, through forgiveness, were ultimately reconciled to one another. Likewise, if all parties involved practice the traits that Paul lists, especially patience, relationships can be restored and God glorified in their restoration.
Connection:
Trust might be said to be the foundation upon which all relationships are built. Without mutual trust, it is difficult for any sort of intimacy to develop. Yet, it goes without saying that while trust is important for any healthy relationship, not everyone is worthy of being trusted - especially if they have given a reason not to be trusted. Lack of trust often inhibits marriage and other family relationships, as one or all parties involved become guarded and cut themselves off from the other in order to protect themselves from being hurt.
It must be noted, however, that we should make a distinction between horizontal trust and vertical trust. Horizontal trust is trust in the earthly realm of human relationships. Within this realm, it is actually warranted for us to be skeptical of others and to a certain extent guard ourselves from untrustworthy people. As the prophet Jeremiah warns, "Thus says the Lord: 'Cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength, whose heart turns away from the Lord'" (Jeremiah 17:5). The Bible indeed teaches us that man is, at heart, sinful - and our ultimate hope and trust should not be placed in man - or even ourselves! (Psalm 118:8-9). But then there is vertical trust- which refers to our trusting in God. This is how we are naturally wired, and scripture encourages us to always trust in God (Proverbs 3:5-6). When our trust is aimed at God, we are equipped to discern how, who, and when to trust others through the application of Biblical wisdom. Jesus often warns that there are many ravenous wolves among us, even amongst the fold of his own sheep. However, when we place our trust in God, we are able to strike a balance between callus mistrust and the development of true intimacy.
Action:
1. Look Inward -
Trust in relationships is a dynamic process. It involves two parties and a myriad of other factors. Whenever trust is breached in a relationship, it requires some introspection from both parties, an admittance of guilt, and a resolve to repair the damage to the relationship.
Wherever trust has been damaged, it is important for both parties involved to be honest with one another, speaking the truth in love (Eph. 4:15). When there is nothing being hidden, both parties can begin to heal and rebuild the broken trust in the relationship.
2. Seek Support -
A relationship void of trust will often require a third-party to mediate discussion between the two affected parties. This can be a trusted friend, an experienced Pastor, or a licensed therapist who is trained to work with damaged relationships and help to rebuild the trust that has been lost.
3. Trust God -
Ultimately, while healthy earthly relationships require trust and are important, they will always require trust in God if there is hope of restoring the relationship. It Is God alone who Is completely above reproach and will never leave or forsake you (Hebrews 13:5-6).