We Cannot Change The Past
Regret Series
“While we may weep bitterly over a decision we have made, we cannot change the past...”
“And now, O sons, listen to me, and do not depart from the words of my mouth. Keep your way far from her, and do not go near the door of her house, lest you give your honor to others and your years to the merciless, lest strangers take their fill of your strength, and your labors go to the house of a foreigner, and at the end of your life you groan, when your flesh and body are consumed, and you say, “How I hated discipline, and my heart despised reproof! I did not listen to the voice of my teachers or incline my ear to my instructors. I am at the brink of utter ruin in the assembled congregation.”
Explanation:
Proverbs 5 is spoken in the context of adultery. The author implores his audience to take his words seriously, reinforcing the vulnerability that young people have to temptation. The wisdom here is sound. In addition to the short-term effects of adultery on the relationships of the offender, one can easily have their whole life "spent" and consumed by the adulterous relationship. This can leave one approaching death to look back at their life with bitter regret - knowing that nothing can be done to win back the years lost to the adulterous relationship.
Connection:
"No regrets" is a popular catchphrase in our society. It is often branded on t-shirts, quoted on social media, and even tattooed on people as a reminder that they would never have done anything differently in their lives. However, is it really healthy for us, as a society, to encourage one another not to regret anything? And are all regrets truly bad or are they the same?
The Bible teaches us that regret is a reality in the Christian life and is, at least in some sense, necessary for repentance and spiritual growth. For instance, having no regrets implies that we have not sinned. However, there is a Godly grief over mistakes we have made and sins that we have committed that brings about repentance (2 Cor 7:8-10). This conviction in our conscience makes us more self-aware and more compassionate toward others. It allows us to reflect honestly upon our actions in the past and to accept the mistakes we have made and all of their implications. It is important to note though that there is not always a solution to the sins we have committed in the past that will eliminate consequences for our actions. As the saying goes, you cannot always put humpty-dumpty back together again. Sometimes our actions shatter relationships and can even change lives - for better or worse. However, we must press forward In the Christian life knowing we are truly forgiven of our sins and doing our best to live according to the standard we are called, making every effort to learn from what we have done in the past and committing to avoiding those same mistakes in the future.
Action:
1. Accept your Situation -
While we may weep bitterly over a decision we have made, we cannot change the past. Esau bitterly regretted selling his birthright to Jacob, but he could not change it (Heb. 12:16-17). Thus, it is important to understand that what is done is done. Healing and restoring relationships can only begin once the past is accepted.
2. Silence Satan -
Letting go of the past is easier said than done. Often, we ourselves are the last person to forgive us. The voice of Satan will convict us of our sin - reminding us that we have transgressed God's law. However, thanks be to God through Jesus Christ, whose blood has set us free from the tyranny of Satan. Remind yourself of this when you are convicted of sin, confident in the all-powerful atoning work of Christ on the cross and remembering that there is no condemnation for those in Christ (Rom. 8:1).
3. Stay Humble -
It is important that we allow ourselves to be teachable at all times so that we can learn from our mistakes. Praying to God to give you a spirit of humility can help condition us to receive his Instruction and can help us to avoid making these same mistakes In the future.